¿Consider This?
by The Turmoil Twins
Summary: The 'Off Beats' of InuYasha have found this survey to drown thier time in. What questions are these and how will they be answered! If not correctly... [Ronald McDonald Slaughtering! Surveyer 3, Kanna Majikkumira!]
1. Survey 1: Hiten Bolt

I'm feeling a fun mood today. Is it because today starts my Spring Break? Or is it because I just came up with a neat idea for a fanfiction? Or maybe it's because Y-100 is over-rating the song, 'Your Body Is A Wonderland'? I will never know! ^_^ Weeeeell, In a little world we call AU, I've decided to make a little survey challenge to the 'OffBeats' of InuYasha. I will make it for other anime,don't you worry! I don't know if this'll be funny to you, But I'm making it for ALOT of InuYasha characters. Okay? It's just.. I hope I get reviews. _ ^_^ _. This is an, 'If the InuYasha cast got used to the idea of modern day Japan, what would they do to confront it' kind of fic. I think I should start now...Enjoy.  
  
Disclaimer!: Don't I wish I owned InuYasha...*dreamy look* Oh, the sheer mix of Man's-Best-Friend, and Woman's-Worst-Worry! How pleasent!  
  
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¿ Consider This ?  
  
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*beep* *flicker**boop* He was logged on. He sipped some of his beloved 'Pepsi Twist', twist of lemon, twist of life (wow that was clique and corny at the same time! How un-nessicary!). Surfing over some cheap apologys of Angelfire and Geocity pages and cracking down on them (like so many of us do), a suspicious pop-up ad...pops up. Hiten hated suspicion. So, being the one-minded, but a hand-some one-minded person he was, clicked the little annoying pop-up. A survey pops up, titled 'Consider this?'. Hiten thinks about this. And after a good 4 second debate thinking, 'Oh, what the hell', he decides to take part in this web-worldly event. Oh what fun this will be for our adorable little action figure!  
  
x. name = Hiten Bolt  
  
x. birthday = September 17th...Uh, what year is it, again?  
  
x. piercings = Only on my ears, dude!  
  
x. tattoos = I DO have this one tattoo...never mind x. severe scars or bodily marks = You make me keel over in laughter, what would *dare* to injure such a bod like mine?! ....Oh. Besides that half- breed  
  
x. height = 5 feet, 3 inches tall, just about  
  
x. shoe size = Who would answer this?!--it's a NINE, by the way. NOT 9 and one 1/2. I'm gorgeous in my own ways. *smirks* (Oh yes he is!--Oh, heh heh *blushes* Sory for the interruption!) x. weight = *deadpanned* This one, I won't even bother to re-read  
  
x. hair color = Black with dark tints of green  
  
x. length = .*stunned*...Of hair on my head, right? *relived* Waist-length (was there something he was trying to hide from us?!) x. what style its in = Braided, Can't stand loose hair  
  
x. siblings = I hate to say it, but my brother, Manten. If I had anymore like him, I'd go on a serious rampage!  
  
x. pets = Pets? The hell? I'd say any lady with a sexy body. But they're only my pets for a limit of 15 minutes, tops. *grins*  
  
last...  
  
x. movie you rented = Something titled, 'Dude Where's My Car'. No that's, an understandable movie. But really! Who would do stuff like that to women?! Good-for-nothings. (I take offense to this. He will be punished.)  
  
x. movie you bought = I dare not buy one of your confound pieces of trash! If I wanted action, I'll go make some!  
  
x. song you listened to = I'm A Cloud, by Boy Hits Car  
  
x. song that was stuck in your head = I'd do no such thing, fool  
  
x. cd you listened to = Dude, what's up with you and music? *frowns* Get a life, man.  
  
x. person you've called = That last vixen on the street looking strikingly like a Water Pixie.  
  
x. person that's called you = That ole' teabag who's cat I was chasing. *snorts* I don't know what the problem was, her cat was playing with my hair, *takes out lighting staff* I played with it's!!  
  
x. tv show you've watched = Which one? My favorite out of 'em all was The Osbournes or something on the lines of that. Don't watch Friends. Anyone in thier right mind wouldn't watch that vile crap.  
  
x. person you were thinking of = That Water Pixie  
  
x. you have a gf = If I would. It wouldn't be fore long.  
  
x. you have a crush on someone = Who the hell are you to tell me about a 'crush'? There is no lover of mine!  
  
x. you wish you could live somewhere else = No. *stares up at the ceiling* The skies are my limit, you could say.  
  
x. you think about suicide = *disturbed* Who the hell would? With a bod and strength like mine, Who'd want to think of something like that?!  
  
x. you believe in online dating = If it's of my opposite sex, yea, sure. Why not?  
  
x. driving drunk = Depends on what I'm drinking, and what I'm driving. Due to the fact I travel on clouds and wheels of fire, It wouldn't really matter what would happen to me  
  
x. soap operas = *turns thumbs down* Not on your life, pal  
  
x. gum = Big Red  
  
x. tv show = I belive I answered that  
  
x. thing in the world = *flexes muscles* My power, of course  
  
x. thing to collect = Jewel Shards  
  
x. colors of all time = Orange, light blue, and blood red  
  
x. thing to do on a rainy day = Make some lightning!  
  
x. feeling in the world = Revenge  
  
favorite...  
  
x. food = Human girl  
  
x. song = You don't back down, now do you? It's The Key To Gramercy Park, by Deadsy  
  
x. thing to do = Either find the shards, or have fun killing to get them. Nothing can go wrong.  
  
x. thing to talk about = Shards, ladies,..shards..*trails off*  
  
x. sports = Does a blood-sport count?  
  
x. drinks = Water  
  
x. clothes = *looks down at what he's currently wearing* I usually wear my armor..but these 'boxers' and the 'undershirt' are pretty comfortable.. ( *falls of chair with a dreamy look on face, chibi eyes, clasped hands and all* )  
  
x. picture = I've got none of those. Who needs one when you can kill to have the real person? *shrugs*  
  
x. holiday = Hal-lo-we-en  
  
x. cars = Those 'eclipse' and 'jaguar' cars look good enough to ride in, cool names too have you...  
  
x. ever cried over a girl = Never have, never will. Men don't cry over that  
  
x. ever lied to someone = Sure. Who doesn't these days?  
  
x. ever been in a fist fight = Who needs a fist when you've got a lightning rod, and a brother who shoots some out of his mouth!  
  
x. ever been arrested = I would if I was caught. IF, I was caught. *smirks*  
  
what...  
  
x. shampoo do you use = ..suave.  
  
x. shoes do you wear = The ones I took hold of from the village in Senjoku Jidai, I can care less who made them, just as long as I have them.  
  
x. are you scared of = Woman's temper-tantrums. What's wrong with you girls? ( I also take offense to that, too. He will be doubly punished. )  
  
number...  
  
x. of times I have been in love?: 0  
  
x. of times I have had my heart broken?: Heh! Many I'll have you know!  
  
x. of hearts I have broken?: More then I can count  
  
x. of boys I have kissed?: 0 for your info, you horny bisexual!  
  
x. of girls I have kissed?: 2  
  
x. of men I've slept with?: NONE!  
  
x. of girls I've slept with?: 3  
  
x. of continents I have lived in?: 1, waaaaaay up north if you know what I mean.  
  
x. of drugs taken illegally?: 0  
  
x. of people I would classify as true, could trust with my life type friends?: 0  
  
x. of people I consider my enemies?: I know it's over 97  
  
x. of people from high school that I stayed in contact with?: Highschool? In the hell?  
  
x. of cd's that I own?: 2  
  
x. of times my name has appeared in the newspaper?: ...*counts* 5?  
  
x. of scars on my body?: ..1.  
  
x. of things in my past that I regret?: 0, A Man Like me regrets NOTHING, I say!  
  
Hiten fully shut off his CPU, and monitor for the evening. 'Jeez, talk about true confessions, now where's the number to the water vixen?'.  
  
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Awwww, I know you liked that! Now please scally-on to the little 'Subit A Review' list, and click go for me! Please review, And I will add more. Any suggestions? or Comments? Crits? I don't mind them.  
  
P.S. I will only start doing this for the under dogs of InuYasha! Such as Hiten, Yura, Kagura, Naraku *shudder*, Kanna, Nobunaga, ya know, the ones who you barely ever see in every episode! I'll do InuYasha-tachi later. If I get requests or reviews to do so. Feh, I can only do so much!  
  
Much ado and depression, Delirium's Hostage 


	2. Survey 2: Naraku Arachna

And so, may it be written in spider venom, I have found this dusty story and decided to update it! So by popular demand.....A VERY popular demand, we have...  
  
Naraku...ah what the hell, Arachna. (Like the phoebia...Arachnaphoebia)  
  
I will make no comment on the bishie thing.  
  
Will this be funny? I don't know. Is Naraku a comedian? I'd think not. But, none-the-less here I am, updating this now.....today....20 seconds on the clock please........Antidote!... Thank you! Sorry about that now slunk off and enjoy. ^_^  
  
Disclaimer: [Enter snazzy little remarks here on how I don't own anything but my day old bagel and half empty--make that empty can of Fanta]  
  
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¿ Consider This ?  
  
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The stupid piece of miserable crap finally turned on after a couple of kicks. That'll teach villans to buy Macs. It was dark.  
  
Naraku sat in his own little room, in his own little chair, with his own little silence....  
  
After getting the sorry apology of a piece of machinery to reach the desktop and on to the internet, Naraku soon became interested in the survey that was presented at a site called 'OMNIPRESENCE' (Disclaimer: I own Omnipresence!! Proving there is something worth living for!).  
  
Thinking that he needed a break from sending out all those Shakira viruses that were all-the-rage (literally), he decided to also take part in the survey that nearly always leads our American generation to the edge of insanity.  
  
x. name = Naraku Arachna  
  
Kanna then waltzes over to look at the glowing screen. She stands back and sniggers.  
  
x. birthday = October 31st, dawning of day  
  
x. piercings = With what? That wench's arrow? 8.  
  
x. tattoos = I refuse to ask what this means.  
  
x. severe scars or bodily marks = So far in past meetings with those wretched action figures I have gone through 2 Golems, razor claws, and numerous enchanted arrows. Now run this question by me again?  
  
x. height = Estimatingly, 5 foot 9.  
  
x. shoe size = You are an example as to stoop so low and wear such tight contraptions over your...9  
  
x. weight = Of what?  
  
x. hair color = Pitch Ebony  
  
x. length = Neverending  
  
x. what style its in = Up and down  
  
x. siblings = Kanna and Kagura  
  
x. pets = Kikyo  
  
last...  
  
x. movie you rented = Something interesting...Very interesting, indeed. "8 Legged Freaks" is what it was called. Ku ku...  
  
x. movie you bought = Ku ku ku.. well I bought two at a time at the time because Kanna was fighting over "The Ring" while Kagura was wanting to get "Twister", so I just bought them both. Kids these days.  
  
x. song you listened to = "Drunken Spider", sung by Maggot  
  
x. song that was stuck in your head = Just last Tuesday is was "Sugar" by S.O.D, but just the other day I was debating to get "Bodies" by Drowning Pool out of my pale head.  
  
x. cd you listened to = There is no tendency for me to answer that  
  
x. person you've called = Kikyou, for moonlight dinner  
  
x. person that's called you = Does it matter?  
  
Kagura walks by at that moment with the daily mail, and rolls her eyes. "Fathers." A letter with a rose thorn and a muddy kiss emparched on it is placed near Naraku's mouse. "Your mail, Mr. Confidential!" Making sure no eyes were on him (think 007) he shoves the mail in his outer hakama.  
  
x. tv show you've watched = Punk'd. Why Kanna wanted to see it I may never know.  
  
x. person you were thinking of = ARGH! Again, there is no need for this!  
  
Kanna walks by and reads that last sentence. Turning her look into a glare she walked away but not before she muttered a, "That's right, you tell 'em Spiderman."  
  
x. you have a gf = gf? More of your native tounge I see. Ask me this again when you know proper english.  
  
x. you have a crush on someone = ...*cough*..No one.  
  
x. you wish you could live somewhere else =  
  
Naraku thinks of this, then hears a clattering of dishes followed by a nervous "My Bad!" and a small slap after you hear "You stupid wind youkai just don't know the art of making exquisit danish! I spit on your spieces!" and the argument and more pan-clattering noises going on from there.  
  
Naraku practially threw his head into his hands murmuring crap about babysitters, but it's not like we care, right? Looking back to the computer he typed his measly little answer of,  
  
...Hell yes.  
  
x. you think about suicide = And let my enemies win?! Are you bloody mad?!!  
  
x. you believe in online dating = Depends on who is talking to me on the other side of the convo  
  
x. driving drunk = It's the only way to drive  
  
x. soap operas = I find "As the World Turns" captivating! Don't you agree?  
  
x. gum = Bazooka, chew it till it's black  
  
x. tv show = Jackass, it brings a new meaning to insecurity, doesn't it?  
  
x. thing in the world = The Shikon no Tama........and pets.  
  
x. thing to collect = Shikon no Tama, psshduh!  
  
x. colors of all time = Black, black, black, and green  
  
x. thing to do on a rainy day = Make it stop  
  
x. feeling in the world = Utter cries of death and imparallel screeching of dying folks on a dark and cold day with a---GODDAMMIT! Where is my Valiums?!! KAGURA!! Did you take my valiums?!  
  
"NO DADDY! But I think Kanna did!!"  
  
"Screw you! STOP PULLING ON MY HAIR! Argh, stop you tree sucking bitch!!"  
  
"OW! Any more tugging on my earrings then my ears will rip off!! STOP!! MATTE! GINGTA!! UNCLE! UNCLEEEEE!!!"  
  
"Christ! Stop your screeching!"  
  
"Hey Don't push me like that, small fry!"  
  
"You can't just talk to your elders like that!"  
  
"Shut up you miscreant little barbaric dolts, you're waking the dead with your rucuss!"  
  
"Pop shove it Kikyou, No one ASKED you!"  
  
"You tell 'em Kagura!"  
  
*twitch*  
  
favorite...  
  
x. food = A nice prune puff pastry will do me good right about now....  
  
x. song = Did I not answer this?  
  
x. thing to do = Kill the living, help the dead, of course  
  
x. thing to talk about = Oh, you know. The usual. Jewelry, weapons, how-to- kill-your-spouse-affectively, How to self breed. I hear it's all the rage! (well, isn't it these days?)  
  
x. sports = Tittleywinks (or whatnot)  
  
x. drinks = Pepsi Blue  
  
x. clothes = What I'm wearing, geez, that was stupid  
  
x. picture = Favorite picture? Would you care? (He has a point there)  
  
x. holiday = Halloween..then that building day. What was that again?  
  
"Number one, it was September 11th. And number two, it wasn't a holiday. It was a day of reconciliation, rememberance, and destruction. It was also the day that I--"  
  
"I don't care Kagura. I just asked a single freggin question."  
  
"Ha ha! You deserved that you hussy! Bwahaha!"  
  
"Do you want to keep those souls, whore?!"  
  
"Bring it!" [insert the Rock hand gesture here]  
  
Then Kagura proceeded to brutally beat the living (or non-living, I dunno) Hell out of Kikyou like she should. Serves the bitch right. Now back to Naraku.  
  
x. cars = Land Rovers  
  
you...  
  
x. ever cried over a girl = That's obsurd, disgraceful, untollerable! ...My mother 800 years ago  
  
x. ever lied to someone = To everyone I meet. But if anyone asks you, you'll have the decency to lie about it  
  
x. ever been in a fist fight = Who needs fists when you have poisionous tentacles, venomous hair, an intollerable scent and a golem to do all that!  
  
x. ever been arrested = Only pansys get arrested! (which probably means that, yes folks, he has been arrested)  
  
what...  
  
x. shampoo do you use = Shampoo is...?  
  
x. shoes do you wear = Whichever ones look good  
  
x. are you scared of = ...pink.  
  
number...  
  
x. of times I have been in love?: Only once, OKAY?!  
  
x. of times I have had my heart broken?: I break thiers, right after thier necks have been finnished off properly  
  
x. of hearts I have broken?: How the hell should I know?! In the nine million zone?  
  
x. of boys I have kissed?: Who the hell are you to judge me  
  
x. of girls I have kissed?: I dont kiss drooling beasts I'll have you know (I take offense to this, he will be punished)  
  
x. of men I've slept with?: 1, Myself  
  
x. of girls I've slept with?: 1  
  
x. of continents I have lived in?: I've earned my own continent  
  
x. of drugs taken illegally?: Hypathetical question, how many bundles of crack can fit into an attic?  
  
"Hey dad! Our roof is leaking powder! What gives?!"  
  
"Pipe it, Kanna! Daddys' busy at the moment."  
  
"But Kikyou has a matc--!"  
  
"Shut up you feeble little--!"  
  
"Why dont you come over here and make me, you wind chime!!"  
  
"Grr..."  
  
"Grr..."  
  
x. of people I would classify as true, could trust with my life type friends?: Not a damn person  
  
x. of people I consider my enemies?: The world is against me, do you want me to count them all?  
  
x. of people from high school that I stayed in contact with?: I do not attend such national groups of knowledge just to prove it. Humans know nothing, nothing I say!!  
  
x. of cd's that I own?: Near the 50,000 Limit, but I haven't robbed any stores as of late because they're re-stocking and breaking down on security. And to think that Americans can trust one another with such nonsence?!  
  
x. of times my name has appeared in the newspaper?: They named the goddamn thing after me  
  
x. of scars on my body?: There is that one spider on my back...if I said a navy buddy gave it to me, would you belive me?  
  
x. of things in my past that I regret?:  
  
"FOR CHRIST SAKE, DAD! MAKE KIKYOU STOP LIGHTING THE MARIJUANA ON FIRE!! SHE'S GONNA BURN DOWN THIS PLACE MORE THEN IT ALREADY IS!!"  
  
*CRASH!*  
  
"Dammit, she fainted on my good China."  
  
"Quick Kanna, we must stash her body onto a conveyer belt to ship to Histonia and be fed to the dirt-thirsty cave-men!"  
  
"Wouldn't burning her at the stake with this stuff as our fuel be more fun?"  
  
"I haven't thought of that. Good thinking, nee-chan! Let's burn the bitch to her own personal domain."  
  
"TO HELL!" They chorused and started the ritual with a handshake.  
  
.......Missing out on this fun is what I *would* regret! Ku ku ku ku ku kuuu......  
  
So SpiderMan shut off his computer by giving it a few good kicks, not realizing this must be the problem of the lagging, and went to seek his daughter's approval for some illegal family fun.  
  
And off into the night they went singing a deadly chant and stashing crack from the none-loved one in the process.  
  
So us people must think of it this way........  
  
Atleast Kagome will be happy from now on!  
  
-=-=-=-  
  
Hey, I thought it was funny..  
  
Flame me all I care, for they will be used in that pot-party burning of Kikyou. And then I will publically flame you back, so I wouldn't go there.  
  
Suggestions? Comments? Praise? Slaps? SEND THEM ON DOWN in a review for that will make my day!  
  
I could surely use suggestions. I'm thinking of doing...uhhh... how about........uhh..no... um, Ayame? Nobunaga? Yura? Jakotsu? Bankotsu? Earthboy? no, not Earthboy. Kanna? Kagura? Kouga? Ginta? Jaken? Rin? Manten? Urasuei? Who? WHO DAMMIT, WHO?!!  
  
So I need help in more ways then one, so sue me.  
  
No wait, don't it was a joke! PUT THE PAPERS AWAY!! *whimpers*  
  
AND REMEMBER KIDDIES! Don't put toasters in the bathtub, it'll make your toast soggy!  
  
Have a GREAT day!  
  
Your Lord and Master,  
  
-Hirari the 9th GOMS 


	3. Survey 3: Kanna Majikkumira

Disclaimers: I don't own Apple software (just my goddamn Dell), Dante's 9 Layer of Hell Test, MSN, Sketchers, The Exorsist, McDonalds, Wendys, Emeril Live! (even though that show is condemned and damned), GameBoy Advanced, The Sound Of Music, Enya's "Only Time", Chii from Chobits clothing, or any other crazy shit I mention..  
  
I would just like to state, that I'm sorry it takes me such awhile to update this story. During this up coming school school season (I hate it as much as it sounds, too. I just want to get my 8th grade year over with!) I am starting a new story. It's called...  
  
A L I C E : A Homicidal Fairytale. The information/full summary is in me and my sister's Bio. It's based off of the PC/CD-Rom Game, American's McGee's Alice. I'm revising it to fit the InuYasha cast properly. It's mostly likely going to become a Inu-Yasha/Kagome Horror/Romance. Yes, everyone, It is a demented version of "Alice In Wonderland" for those of you who haven't played the game. NOT for small children who don't want their brains soiled. I'm going through the walk-throughs of the game, and all I need is your ideas if you'd really want to read something like that. If not, I wont even start it.  
  
I will kick my own ass just to update all of my stories. Because I hate the look of dissappointment, even though I can't see you, I'll still feel guilty. But I will not lag. All I need is some REVIEWERS-POWERS to inspire me faster! ^_~  
  
SO! Now let's end this crap about school and go on with the fic!  
  
'Cuz summer ain't over yet!  
  
3rd Surveyer: Kanna Majikkumira (japanese term :: Magic Mirror)  
  
:-:_"_:-:_"_:-:_"_:-:_"_:-:_"_:-:_"_:-:_"_:-:_"_:-:_"_:-:_"_:-:  
  
Unlike her father, Kanna had a sheer taste for computers and fine danish. With her clear colored Apple that matched her white room with comfy coushioned walls, clothes, and well.. everything else, Kanna was on top of the world.  
  
Well, Dante's 9 Layer of Hells test proved otherwise (I will mention that I belong in the 7th Layer of hell with all the suicidals and centuars with flaming bows and arrows who pin you in the pit of your soul if you dare escape their clutches. Oh, the things I look forward to...) for she belonged to the Styx (6th or 8th layer). Her Apple's screen flickered onto her MSN service provider with the little multi-colored butterfly that Kanna looked forward to seeing everyday.  
  
Signing on to her name, an intresting ad popped up onto her screen. 'Waitasec.. isn't this the survey Naraku was taking a week ago..?' Standing up from her seat and locking her white door's notch so no one can interfere with her "me" time.  
  
Hovering her cursor over the ad and clicking the Open New Window majiger, she waited patiently as the new window loaded the survey. She was a good waiter.. or waitress.  
  
x. name = Kanna Majikkumira  
  
x. birthday = What's a 'birthday'? Is that some kind of sick joke??  
  
x. piercings = I keep asking Naraku to get my ears pierced, but he just says "How can you get nothing pierced?". Damnit.. that's right, keep throwing that up in my face.. (Kanna was spawned from Naraku to resemble 'nothingness'. Figure out the rest)  
  
x. tattoos = Another thing I can't get.  
  
x. severe scars or bodily marks = The one that's on my back slitting down my spine. I played the little posessed girl in "The Exorcist", you know.. oh shit I wasn't supposed to say that..  
  
A loud and obnoxious rapping was heard on her door frame on the other side of her door.  
  
"Kanna, Juuroumaru and Kageroumaru haven't inhailed their hourly stomach acid, so get your ass in the kitchen and make them some!!" Kagura yelled, pretty pissy for the damn weekend.  
  
Kanna looked over at her door. "NO EFFIN' WAY KAGURA!! I'm not letting my own brothers feed from my stomach again! Damnit, tell them to order McDonalds. Wendy's gives them heartburn."  
  
"Do you mean the clown or the food? Ah hell, I'll order them both..."  
  
A minute later the two white haired men prodded at Kanna's door saying things like "WE LOVE YOU SIS!" or "Stop carving things in her door, you stupid idgit midget (guess who^^)!" Kanna threw the nearest item, a clear glass vase with nothing in it but seltzer, at her door angrily.  
  
"Go suckle Kohaku out of his room for a game of checkers, fools!"  
  
"Yes, dear Kanna...bitch.."  
  
"Don't think I didn't hear that, Kageroumaru. And STOP carving crap in my door! Just because you have the custody of the brains in this family, doesn't give you the right to go Polter-bitch on us."  
  
"Got that right, sista! Wait.. what the hell?"  
  
x. height = 5' 0" ..leave me alone..  
  
x. age = I lost track around 100-something.  
  
x. shoe size = My ballet shoes are size 4... My sketchers are size 4... My feet all-in-all is atleast size 4.  
  
x. weight = Does my face imitate numbers, or is this a hypathetical question? I doubt human intelligance.  
  
x. hair color = snow white  
  
x. length = aliiiiittle past my shoulders  
  
x. what style it's in = down, fool.  
  
x. sisters? brothers? = Gee, where do I start.. I have an ugly psychic oni...  
  
Kanna, unnoticably, says this aloud while typing it. Camera 23D in the corner of her room is played in the main room where almost all of the rest of her family is, with the exception of Kagura (she had to go to WacDonalds because Kanna was hogging the phone connection and her cell's battery ran out).  
  
Goshinki peers up at the ceiling from his Connect 4 game with Naraku. While he wasn't looking Naraku unnoticably slipped another one of his black pieces in a slot, chuckling "fool".  
  
Goshinki breaks into a fit of sobs saying things like "she doesn't love me anymore.." or "Atleast Im not uglier then nothing!". But soon realizing after what he just said, he cried somemore. Naraku got fed up at one point and went upstairs to change his Baboom pelt (he goes through them like Kleenex at a Cry-Me-A-River-Matinee).  
  
A stomach eating brother, who is the truth behind PMS only in a human form.. and you can't forget his lackey who is, "smarter then Naraku himself". Yeah right. He's smarter then Naraku and I'm Emeril's pupil (Emeril: Porkfat rules! BAM! Where's my damn paycheck?!).  
  
Hearing this, Juuroumaru and Kageroumaru laugh insanely. Subomaru looks up at the ceiling from playing his Gameboy Advance (the on that looks like a women's compact, for the love of god, they get smaller and smaller every year till ultimately it's the size of a keychain).  
  
Juuroumaru and Kageroumaru didn't really have a protest and got wierd glances from other spawn's of Satan. Whoops. I mean Naraku... Yeah, Satan.  
  
"You are both fucked up. I don't care how much Goshinki keeps crying, Naraku keep's bitching, or Kagura keeps beating up the clown bastard from that chain resturant.. But what you both do it totally fucked up." Subomaru shook his head. "Jesus, what I do just to have a roof over my fucking head and food at the table.."  
  
Still, Juuromaru giggled like giddy school girl while Kageroumaru glared at him for the que to stop. Which he caught about 6 minutes later of his annoying giggles.  
  
..a brother who must have a special connection with the PMS-in-flesh- mesh.  
  
"....Goddamn, YOUR GRANDCHILDREN Kanna!!" Subomaru bellowed, going back to his game of Kirby Tilt-N-Tumble. Kirby NEVER goes in the right direction! (-.-) fucking thing.  
  
...a sister who dances to please gods who can't even answer your questions...  
  
At that moment, Kagura walks through the front door with a beaten and bloody Ronald McDonald, and a big mac with a large fry. Oh yeah, and a diet coke.  
  
Kagura growled at the intercom, "First this bitch!" She threw the pathetic unconscious Ronald to the floor with a thud, the second it did, Kagemaru and Juuroumaru instantly started to piece him open and withdrawl his bloody acid through his intestines. "And now Kanna! I'M SORRY I CAN'T MAKE D-DANISH! I'M SOOOOORRRYYYY!! I CAN CHANGE, KANNA!! I CAN CHAAAAAANGEE!!"  
  
Kagura broke down on her knees into emotional and LOUD sobs, until Naraku came back downstairs and told his whole family to shut up and stop smacking her with random items, because knives were more useful.  
  
...and a stolen kid.  
  
Kohaku looked up twords Naraku, eyes pleading to tell him it wasn't the truth.  
  
Naraku scowled reaching for the back of Kohaku's neck collar thingy. Kohaku stood and put a hand over his heart, "I... shall not...be imtimidated like this..any..longer!"  
  
Everyone stopped what they were doing and looked up at Kohaku.  
  
"Screw you guys, I'm going home! WOO HOO!" Kohaku ran out of the opened doors and jumped all around singing a mixed version of "The Sound of Music" and "Only Time". After he gathered enough money from passer-byes he high- tailed it out of Naraku's Kingdom to find his sister, Sango, and her loyal companions.  
  
Naraku was currently wiping his eyes with a hanky and with a half dead/half alive Ronald McDonald comforting with what arm he has left. "They grow up.. *sniff* and they leave me.. OH WHAT 'TIS A FATHER TO DO?!"  
  
x. pets = Kikyo.. but I killed her. She almost burned down my house... little whore.  
  
last...  
  
x. movie you rented = The Mirror Has Two Faces. Ahh, I was always a sucker for romantic comedy.  
  
"I CAN CHANGE KANNA!! I CAN CHAAAAAANGE!! WHAAAAAA--ow! Sonvabitch, Kagura.. What the hell is up YOUR ass?!"  
  
"STOP MOCKING ME YOU GAMEGIRL PSYCHO! Argh!" A whole bunch of cursing and fist fighting was heard downstairs.  
  
"IT'S GAMEBOY, NOT GAMEGIRL!!"  
  
..silence..  
  
....  
  
"Great, I have a gayfer for a brother. Get the hell away from me.."  
  
x. movie you bought = Naraku got me The Ring, and that was the last.  
  
x. song you listened to = Stained Black Mirror by Inane Eminence  
  
"I wouldn't be suprised if she went suicidal on us. For the love of christ, she has a mirror on her ceiling."  
  
"You gotta be shittin' me, Kageroumaru."  
  
"I shit you not, Juuroumaru."  
  
"SHE WHAT?! KANNA GET YOUR PALE ASS DOWN HERE, NOW!"  
  
"IN A FREGGIN' MINUTE, NARAKU! I'm doing a survey. Now if you don't mind I'm not here right now, so please leave a message after the beep. ......Beeep.."  
  
"No! I'm not falling for that again, Kanna! GET OUT HERE AND FACE ME LIKE NOTHING!"  
  
"Damnit. No."  
  
"Fine! Ronald Get your ugly ass up here and scare some sense into her.. Ronald?... Fuck. Why'd you guys have to eat his lungs before he had a change to knock some sense into my daughter?.. Lousy bastards.. Can't get anything straight around here."  
  
"Especially Subomaru and his GameBOY."  
  
"I'm not GAY, it's just the NAME of the damn THING!"  
  
"Yeah, sure, more excuses. Tell it to your psychiatrist."  
  
x. song that was stuck in your head = Believe In Nothing by Nevermore  
  
x. cd you listened to = "Fallen" composed by Amy Lee ft. 12 Stones in Evanesence  
  
x. person you've called = Why the hell would I call someone when I can get Direct COnnect through my mirror?  
  
x. person that's called you = Kagura. Yeah, it's kinda obvious with her wailing about not being a superior chef, such as I. I am wise I am wonderful I am..Kanna. MuWaHaZ!  
  
"That's it. I'm giving back her self-denial privaleges. She's pissing me off the deep end."  
  
"Eat your checkers, Goshinki."  
  
"Yes, Kage-sama."  
  
"I can't belive I raised such nice children."  
  
..The (REAL) Adam's Family Moment.  
  
x. tv show you've watched = Punk'd with my dad. Who'd of thought Ashton Kutcher would be dating a 56 year old bat, when he can choose out of a lot of ladies from the 7-11, I'll never know.  
  
x. person you were thinking of = Ship...pou?  
  
Kagura stood up from her lounge chair. "I will NOT stand for this!"  
  
Juuroumaru looked up from his bone-licking, "Then you shall sit." At the same time a voice in the distance said the exact same words, followed by a loud and bone-cracking thud.  
  
Juuroumaru and the voice snapped thier head's up, "JYNX! YOU OWE ME A SODA!! Huh? What the hell?"  
  
.:.:.:.:.:.:.  
  
"Kagome, who are you talking to?" Sango looked up from cleaning her boomerang, with intrest.  
  
Kagome blinked and stared out into the forest, "I dunno..Sounded familiar, though."  
  
InuYasha climbed out of his body-shaped cookie crater and glared at HIS Kagome. "The wench is hallucinating, I knew the heat would get to her--"  
  
"SIT!"  
  
.:.:.:.:.:.:.  
  
"Who needs AT&T when all you can do is scream at your neighbor?"  
  
"I said, eat your checkers Goshinki."  
  
"grr.."  
  
x. you have a gf = I'm horizontal. Not vertical.  
  
x. you have a crush on someone = ..no.  
  
x. you wish you could live somewhere else = After all thats happened, would you think I'd want to live somewhere else?  
  
x. you think about suicide = Tell me this. How in the blue hells would I kill NOTHING? I am NOBODY. Nothing. Nobody is perfect. So I must be perfect.  
  
"When cows fly, small fry!"  
  
Kanna got up and walked over to Camera 31A, "Why would I need to see cows fly when I can go to your grandmama's bathtub to see a naked whale."  
  
GASP!  
  
"My grandmama?! YOUR grandmama!"  
  
Naraku stood from his seat on the couch and ripped the battery out of Subomaru's hands and ate the batteries. "You know how Kanna gets over these conversations, so save it."  
  
x. you believe in online dating = More artificial human intelligance I see. Online dating? Do you know how many people get killed that way? Catch me on a day when someone doesn't get raped.  
  
x. driving drunk = I'll only get pulled over or killed. What doosh-bag drives drunk? You're all fools.  
  
x. soap operas = T.V. Shows sponsered by soap ads? If I wanted to watch wrestling then I'd say so.  
  
x. gum = Orbitz  
  
x. tv show = That's 70's Show. Atleast Ashton Kutcher has a life waiting for him there. Even if Kelso is stupider then Frankenstein, it's still funny to watch.  
  
x. thing in the world = Must you ask me this?  
  
x. thing to collect = White things..  
  
x. colors of all time = I'll give you 1 guess, I'm not feeling that generous.  
  
x. thing to do on a rainy day = Climb the highest tree, and pray for lightning.  
  
x. feeling in the world = Turmoil, Pain, Victory.  
  
"Thata girl."  
  
favorite...  
  
x. food = Maple covered puff pastries with cream custard in the flaky outside.  
  
x. song = Get Busy by Sean Paul RMX Ft. Fatman Scoop  
  
x. thing to do = Haunt.  
  
x. thing to talk about = Nothing.  
  
x. sports = Is soul-sucking a sport in this generation?  
  
Kagura stopped knitting for a minute, "I'd think it is. Doesn't the Presidential Cabinet of America do it on their spare-time?"  
  
"We may never know, sis," Subomaru wistfully spoke, "we may never know..."  
  
x. drinks = Lizzard Blizzard SOBEs.  
  
x. clothes = ..I do think Chii's clothes look good on me.. Ahem. yeah.  
  
x. picture = I burned them. So it wouldn't matter.  
  
x. holiday = St. Patrick's Day?  
  
"Great we have a Quaker in our family."  
  
"Kagura, shut up, we wouldn't read the Bible anyways."  
  
"Oh... we... wouldn't? Heheh..e. Whoops."  
  
"Whoops? WHOOPS? Whoops isn't good.."  
  
x. cars = The Police Station won't even give me my lisense because I'm "Underage". All they do is laugh at me when I say, "I'm older then your whole damn squad and the people who came to arrest you by ship's 'n boats. I should atleast get my lisense today!"  
  
you...  
  
x. ever cried over a girl = Give me a reason why I would even think about doing that.  
  
x. ever lied to someone = Who doesn't?  
  
x. ever been in a fist fight = Yeah, but my brothers come and eat them If I do or don't win.  
  
x. ever been arrested = Heh. I'm UNDERAGE to go to prison! GRRR--Wait.. Isn't that a good thing?  
  
what...  
  
x. shampoo do you use = Dove. No really, Doves.  
  
Juuroumaru snuck over to take a peak on his beloved birds of feather. Only to horrifyingly notice that only one feather lay in the cage. His eyes got all watery when he turned to his family in remorse.  
  
"Where is Romeo and Juliet? Where have my darlings GONE?!"  
  
Subomaru's eye narrowed, "Calm it down! You're starting to sound like Jakotsu!"  
  
Kagura appeared magically next to Suboru and started poking him in his narrowed eye, "How would you know about Jakotsu?! Huh? Huh? Huh? Huh? Huh? Huh?..."  
  
x. shoes do you wear = I mentioned it once. I shan't not repeat myself.  
  
x. are you scared of = Well, an hour ago I wasn't scared of anything. But now Subomaru scares me more then Jakotsu. He's my family, for the love of swimming Monkeys! (I don't own Donkey Kong)  
  
number...  
  
x. of times I have been in love?: 0  
  
x. of times I have had my heart broken?: 0  
  
x. of hearts I have broken?: 0  
  
x. of boys I have kissed?: 0  
  
x. of girls I have kissed?: 0  
  
x. of men I've slept with?: 0  
  
x. of girls I've slept with?: 0  
  
x. of continents I have lived in?: 0  
  
x. of drugs taken illegally?: 0  
  
x. of people I would classify as true, could trust with my life type friends?: 0  
  
x. of people I consider my enemies?: EMERIL, YOU PANSY, I SHALL OUT-COOK YOU YET!  
  
x. of people from high school that I stayed in contact with?: 0  
  
x. of cd's that I own?: 153  
  
x. of times my name has appeared in the newspaper?: 9 times for harassing the Police Squad for my lisense, ALL I WANTED WAS MY LISENSE!! IS IT TOO MUCH TO ASK??  
  
x. of scars on my body?: 1  
  
x. of things in my past that I regret?: I came from the past, so If there was one thing I have come to regret, then I'd be the first one to be notified. But we'll burn that bridge when we get to it.  
  
Kanna sighed knowing that trouble was just waiting to come and slit her throat downstairs. She slowly and gracfully turned off her Apple and walked out of her room, not taking notice to what was carved on her door.  
  
..silence..  
  
"KANNA, EXPLAIN THE MIRROR OVER YOUR BED THING!"  
  
"KANNA TELL KAGURA TO STOP PKING ME IN THE EYE! SUCK HER UP! SUCK HER UP!!"  
  
"KANNA IS IT TRUE THAT JERRY SPRINGER IS LOCKED IN YOUR CLOSET?! CAN WE EAT HIM?? CAN WE SIS, CAN WE??"  
  
"Fese Fheckhers fasse FERRIBABLE! grr.."  
  
"I knew I should have used the window."  
  
:-:_"_:-:_"_:-:_"_:-:_"_:-:_"_:-:_"_:-:_"_:-:_"_:-:_"_:-:_"_:-:  
  
That concludes this bitchy chapter. Took two days to type up, and now I'm about exhauseted from typing. If there are any grammatic mistakes, sorry, but I'm too lazy to correct them, so ignore it.  
  
I'm probably doing one of the Shichinin-tai next time. Or maybe Ayame. I don't know, just vote for whoever you want me to interview. BUT REMEMBER! It can't be Sango, Kagome, InuYasha, Miroku, Shippou, Sesshoumaru, Kikyo, or someone who has appeared very many times. I'm talking about the Underdogs of InuYasha. Like, Nobunaga, Kohaku, Shichinin-tai which consists of Jakotsu, Renkotsu, Bankotsu, Kyoukotsu, Mukotsu, Ginkotsu, or Suikotsu. People like that. Well, most of them look like people, I could just be paranoid.  
  
Anywhooooo, I hope you liked this chapter, it was ahelluva lotta work for me to complete. So thanks for reading, please leave me a review, and I'll make a new chapter, hopefully, soon to come! Remember to give in your suggestions, too.  
  
May the rest of your summer be merry!  
  
I love you, just not in that way,  
  
Hirari the 9th Goddess Of Maple Syrup 


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